When My Emotions Spiral: How to Stop the Overthinking Loop
Overthinking rarely announces itself. It doesn’t kick the door down and say, “Hi, I’m here to take over your day.”
Instead, it sneaks in quietly… a single thought that feels important, responsible, or protective. Before you know it, your mind is replaying conversations, predicting outcomes, scanning for danger, and asking “What if?” on repeat.
If you’ve ever said:
“I can’t shut my brain off.”
“I know I’m overthinking, but I don’t know how to stop.”
“My emotions feel so big I don’t trust myself.”
Your nervous system is overwhelmed. And it doesn’t always have to feel this way.
This blog breaks down how emotional spirals and overthinking loops actually work, how to recognize them early, how they show up mentally, physically, and relationally and five concrete ways a therapist can help you interrupt the cycle instead of just trying to “think positive.”
Overthinking wraps you up in fear… therapy safely unwraps it with you.
What Is an Overthinking Loop?
An overthinking loop happens when your brain gets stuck trying to solve emotional discomfort instead of feeling it.
Your mind starts working overtime to:
Prevent mistakes
Avoid rejection or conflict
Protect you from uncertainty
Gain a sense of control
The problem? Emotions don’t resolve through logic alone. So the brain keeps spinning, searching for certainty that doesn’t exist.
Over time, this creates a feedback loop: Thought → Emotion → Body Reaction → More Thoughts
And the spiral tightens.
How to Notice When Overthinking Is Starting
Many people don’t realize they’re overthinking until they’re already deep in it. Learning to spot the early signs can make a big difference.
Subtle signs you’re entering a spiral:
You’re replaying the same scenario with different outcomes
You feel an urgent need to figure it out right now
You’re mentally preparing for conversations that haven’t happened
You’re looking for reassurance but it doesn’t stick
You feel restless, tense, or mentally “buzzing”
A helpful question to ask yourself:
“Am I solving a real problem, or trying to escape an uncomfortable feeling?”
That pause alone can slow the loop.
How Overthinking Shows Up in Your Thoughts
Overthinking often disguises itself as being responsible, insightful, or self-aware. But the tone of your thoughts tells the real story.
Common overthinking thought patterns:
Catastrophizing: “If this goes wrong, everything falls apart.”
Mind-reading: “They must be upset with me.”
All-or-nothing thinking: “If it’s not done perfectly, I’ve failed.”
Second-guessing: “Did I say the wrong thing? Should I have handled that differently?”
Rumination: Replaying the past instead of learning from it
These thoughts don’t feel neutral, they feel urgent. That urgency is your nervous system, not your intuition.
Overthinking: the art of creating problems that weren’t even there.
How Overthinking Shows Up Physically
Your body often recognizes an emotional spiral before your mind does.
Physical signs of overthinking:
Tight chest or shallow breathing
Jaw clenching or teeth grinding
Headaches or neck/shoulder tension
Stomach discomfort or nausea
Fatigue from mental exhaustion
Difficulty sleeping or staying asleep
This is your body stuck in fight-or-flight mode, even if nothing dangerous is happening. When the body is on high alert, the brain follows.
That’s why telling yourself to “calm down” rarely works.
How Overthinking Affects Relationships
Overthinking doesn’t stay contained in your head… it spills into how you relate to others.
In relationships, it can look like:
Reading between the lines of texts or tone changes
Needing frequent reassurance but still feeling unsure
Avoiding conflict out of fear of saying the wrong thing
Over-explaining or people-pleasing
Withdrawing because it feels safer than being misunderstood
You might start questioning yourself more than the situation:
“Am I too much?”
“Am I being dramatic?”
“Did I mess this up?”
Over time, this can erode trust, not just in others, but in yourself.
Why Emotional Spirals Are So Hard to Stop Alone
Overthinking isn’t a lack of insight. Many people who overthink are deeply self-aware.
The challenge is that you can’t think your way out of a nervous system response.
When emotions spiral:
The rational brain goes offline
The body prioritizes safety over logic
Thoughts become rigid and repetitive
This is why advice like “just stop thinking about it” or “look on the bright side” often feels invalidating or useless.
How Therapy Helps Stop the Overthinking Loop (5 Key Ways)
Working with a therapist isn’t about eliminating thoughts; it’s about changing your relationship with them.
Here are five ways therapy can help break emotional spirals:
1. Helping You Identify Triggers Before the Spiral Hits
A therapist helps you recognize patterns (emotional, relational, and situational) that set off overthinking.
Instead of reacting after the spiral starts, you learn to notice:
Early body cues
Specific emotional triggers
Situations where your nervous system feels unsafe
Awareness creates choice.
2. Teaching You How to Regulate Your Nervous System
Because overthinking is tied to physiological stress, therapy focuses on calming the body, not just the mind.
This might include:
Grounding techniques
Breathwork tailored to anxiety
Learning how to discharge stress from the body
Understanding why certain techniques work for you
Once the body feels safer, the mind naturally slows down.
3. Helping You Separate Thoughts From Truth
In therapy, you learn how to notice thoughts without automatically believing them.
Instead of:
“This thought must be true because it feels intense.”
You begin to say:
“This is a stress response, not a fact.”
That shift reduces the power thoughts have over your emotions and decisions.
4. Addressing the Emotions Beneath the Overthinking
Overthinking often protects you from emotions like:
Fear
Shame
Grief
Anger
Vulnerability
A therapist helps you gently access and process what’s underneath, so your mind doesn’t have to keep spinning to avoid it.
When emotions are felt and validated, they move. When they’re avoided, they loop.
5. Rebuilding Trust in Yourself
Perhaps the most important part: therapy helps you reconnect with your inner compass.
Over time, you learn to:
Trust your feelings without being overwhelmed by them
Make decisions without endless second-guessing
Tolerate uncertainty without spiraling
Feel grounded even when emotions are strong
This isn’t about being calm all the time; it’s about feeling steady.
You’re Not Weak for Overthinking
Overthinking is often a sign that you care deeply, feel intensely, and want to do things “right.” But living in constant mental loops is exhausting, and unnecessary.
You don’t need to silence your mind.
You don’t need to control every emotion.
You don’t need to figure everything out.
You need support, regulation, and space to feel safely.
If emotional spirals and overthinking loops are interfering with your sleep, relationships, or sense of peace, working with a therapist can help you slow things down; not by forcing calm, but by creating it.
Would you like support to stop overthinking?
Therapy can help you understand your patterns, calm your nervous system, and stop living in your head so much of the time. You deserve relief that actually lasts; not just temporary reassurance.
You don’t have to do this alone. Reach out today via link here.
